No really, no need to thank me

Thanksgiving dinner was a delightful mixture of good friends, hilarious conversation, fantastic food and too much wine which culminated in us hitting a bar at which point we started talking to a chirpy bunch of Irish lads.
 
One of my friends, Miss Mascara ended up going home with one cute kid and whilst the other was funny, there really wasn't a spark so I left at a reasonable hour. Her memory isn't that clear on the whole night but as it turns out, after she wakes up, his sister is here to stay so best pretend she was with his flat mate. She comes downstairs and is duly interrogated by the sister - not about chosen man, but the flat mate - who, and I know it's not really a laughing matter but, TRIED TO HANG HIMSELF when they had got home.
 
Men are reduced to giving up on life after speaking me. We've hit a new low.
 
But even more peculiar this kid emails today and wants to go out for drinks next week? Huh? What the?
 
It's not enough I can't find a nice normal guy to have a nice normal relationship with, now I'm killing them?