Minge at 10 O'Clock!

In one of the most hilarious conversations I've had in a long time last night at girl's dinner, a gorgeous American friend described in fierce detail the experience of attending a German day spa in (name protected for legal and more importantly ridicule-related reasons). At this 13-stage progression-spa, she was stripped, scrubbed, scoured, squeezed, sandpapered, pummeled, primed, pushed and prodded then she was suddenly thrust out and exposed. Very very viciously exposed.
 
After 12 stages of female companionship. BOOM. Males, naked ones everywhere. In homegrown fur-shorts. The fear was terrifying. Frantically searching for her husband amongst the leering eyes in the room - desperately trying to keep eyes above shoulder height to identify her beloved. When she realised a shocking fact (and one that I never knew)...Japanese pubic hair is straight. Correct, straight out, no curl, no wriggles, dead straight- and standing to attention. Wow. 
 
She was a nether-regionally 'neat' woman herself, as she had previously realised in the female section of the soft blue film she was now in. Suddenly she feeling more self conscious about her lack of cover in more ways than one. Swiftly discovering her husband she hurried to a spa where by the magical words where uttered...'Darling can you keep your minge underwater...the Germans think you have cancer.'
 
I mean it was fine in England and America but clearly the Germans didn't agree...and were giving her the X-Factor triple gong.
 
Oh well, you can't please all the people all the time and I guess there are always going to be some differences that can't be sorted out in the Treaty of WWII.